The Way You Start a Day

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I do believe there is so much about a morning ritual that truly has such a lasting effect on your day & continued happiness.

Mornings when I eat a healthier breakfast I make healthier choices throughout the day. When I wake up early to engage in some form of physical activity I am more productive. When I treat myself to self reflection and "me" time I'm happier and introspective. Mornings that I spend interacting with someone I love I'm more communicative and approachable. Mornings that I start off reading a chapter out of a book or listing to calming music I am more peaceful and relaxed. Overall I much prefer days like these to the days when I'm rushing around to get ready for the day, devour a quick and meaningless meal, and racing out the door, which happens more often than I'm willing to acknowledge. I need to start giving mornings more credit. So many of us identify ourselves as "not morning people" but if we say that then we believe it and thus create a self-fulfilling prophecy that impacts our entire day, and days stack up to a life. I think of it like Jenga, you can't let the bottom get wonky right off the bat otherwise the game is practically over before it even begins. If we aren't "morning people" then how can we be "day people" or "afternoon people" or "night people?" 

I don't believe there is a rhyme or rhythm to the morning. There is no guide or manual that I'm aware of. It's just the time of the day when you show yourself that you know yourself. You know best what your body needs to feel good whether it's a particular meal, routine, ritual, or song... and if you don't then you ought to start listening.

What a great morning I had. I started off with a 30 minute run with my sweet friend Maile as we downloaded our lives together. Then nourished my body with a green smoothie and mug of green tea. I wrote a letter to my NYC pen pal/sorority sister Justine and now I'm blogging. I'm going to make a quick list of gratitude and smile to myself in my cozy loft. Brett Dennen is calmly playing the soundtrack to my events and I'm about to take a shower while I reflect on positive affirmations, then make my bed, and get to work. This is what my body needs, and I'll be thanking myself later.... even if it was so hard to roll out of bed at 5:45am.

It's going to be a good day.

Five Fall Trend Obsessions

I am so excited that fall is here. I always get excited to dust off my military coat and pull out my coziest sweaters but I've never been more excited about the fall beauty trends. I'm ready to retire my coral lipstick and turquoise nail polish and redefine my own sophistication in simple, yet bold, new ways. Here are 5 things I'm obsessed with at the moment...

Plum Lips (Oh la la vamp!)

Feeling bold? Try MAKE UP FOREVER #48 (satin blackcurrant) or more subtle #13 (pearly plum) I have both (#48 pictured above) and love them. I'm also on the hunt for a deep magenta and deep purple. This is my favorite trend of the season.

Fishtail Braid 

The messier the better I say. Check out this video to learn how, it's super easy and fast.

Vintage Wings

I'll admit- it took me over a year and a test-run on 12 different liners to get this right. The best advice is to keep practicing. This look can be so simple yet so glam and dramatic. It's definitely my go-to method these days as it only takes me about 2 minutes. My favorites liners: tokidoki Perfecto Liner, Still Stay All Day liner, Sephora Waterproof Smoky Cream Liner, & Revlon ColorStay Liquid Eye Pen.

Muted Nails with Sparkle

I love the slight subtle of sparkle on top of a muted shade. My favorite combo is Sephora by OPI Frankly I Don't Give A-Dam with Sephora by OPI Only Gold For Me top coat.

Chic Messy Bun

Skip the clean hair and pile your hair on the top of your head in a chic messy bun. Don't worry about the pieces that fall down or dangle, let the fall winds dance with them. 

Now go jump in a pile of leaves...

"pageant" 101: feel good, look good

Gasp! The swimsuit presentation...

Pageant Tip #2
Feel good, look good.

Whether it's a crown you seek, or the simple desire to love your body you must first start with the feeling your create within.  Before you begin you must first know yourself and how your body reacts to different foods and physical activities. What works for one person isn't going to work for everyone. Getting to your ideal place comes from understanding what your body needs and researching the various avenues that will take you there. Over the course of the year I took several different approaches towards getting myself  to where I wanted to be. Many of those approaches came from research and more research. Ultimately what I found most valuable was when I felt good, I looked good. The greatest lesson to learn is that in pageantry the swimsuit competition is won from the neck up. The way you "feel" in a swimsuit is written all over your face- whether you know it or not. There is no way out of this one folks, you have to feel good before you can look good. 

Another important piece that I always try to stress to people is pageants aren't all about fitness, that is only a minor component of the big picture. If you want to compete in a fitness competition then there are competitions for that, but pageants aren't it. It's a huge pet peeve of mine when someone asks a girl what she has been doing to prepare for a pageant and the first thing she says is "working out." That makes it sound as if we only care about image. There is so much more to be learned in preparation for the swimsuit competition, how to feel comfortable and confident, how to be healthy and sustain energy, how to know your body, how to treat your body, and how to embrace the body you've been given and work it!

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Since I am a vegetarian I had to take my own approaches towards feeling good and being healthy. As a vegetarian it is very easy to just consume carbs to satisfy hunger- but what I ultimately found was that carbs just made me tired and lethargic and less feeling good and more feeling "yuck." I had to figure out what food was going to give me the right kind of energy that I needed to perpetuate my lifestyle and help me stay on track with my fitness goals. I did a lot of reading about raw foods, power foods, green smoothies & alternative protein consumption. Here are some of my favorite finds:

 Kim's Beauty Detox Solution

The Abs Diet

Herbalife

The Clean Program

On top of making sure the food I was eating was nourishing my body I also researched plans for appropriate physical activity. During my pageant preparations I worked a full time job as a teacher, a part time job as an after-school enrichment teacher, and also held other various roles. It was not feasible for me to spend all of my time at the gym, nor was it even necessary. I needed to figure out how to maximize my time so that the activities I was engaging in were making me happy and also helping me gain strength and balance. I found that too much cardio for me caused me to shed a lot of weight- and I did not want to be "skinny." I learned to balance cardio with strength building exercises. I also was searching for ways to enjoy the time I spent working out. I tried P90x for a while and when I got bored I moved on. I tried Zumba and loved it so much, it made me feel great and taught me some fun dance moves. I also started working with a personal trainer, this way my strength building was appropriate for my goals and not to harsh. I also loved spending time with her and she taught me many valuable lessons and became one of my dearest friends. When I traveled to the coast I would run along the shore line, when I found a flight of stairs I would climb them and I would even do calf raises when I was out on the playground with my students. Physical activity was not a chore but always something I looked forward to. The best part about doing something physical is the way it makes you feel afterwards. Feel good, look good.

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When it was time to prepare for Miss USA I recognized that as Miss USA you represent powerful, healthy, working women in this country. I wanted to make sure that I was nothing short of that. After the competition I found the most flattering compliments to be those that reflected my healthy body and confidence. The truth is, I did feel healthy and confident. I was taking vitamins, consuming plenty of antioxidants (green tea and berries), staying hydrated, keeping a food journal, and working myself just enough to feel strong and energized while having fun and enjoying my life. 

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It's not about being skinny, or drastic about changing the way you look. It's about embracing yourself, loving yourself, knowing what your body needs and treating it the way it deserves to be treated. Your bodes does amazing things for you, it should be pampered no differently than your toy poodle or you high heel collection. Love yourself and enjoy the journey.

feel good, look good, enjoy the journey-

25

Reflections of the past 25 years and my next quarter of a century resolutions...

It's pretty easy to get caught up in a number. 25 years- it's a big deal to me. If things had gone according to the plans I'd made for myself when I was six I'd have at least two children by now, and a husband, maybe a Golden Retriever, and most likely a silver mini-van. But when I was six I couldn't have even dreamed in my wildest dreams about the amazing life that I was destined to experience. 

In 25 short years I was privileged to... survive a bee sting to my tongue, shy away at the opportunity to meet Doogie Howser, help raise my two younger brothers, speak at my middle school graduation, make lasting friendships in high school, be Miss New Mexico Teen USA 2005 and place top 10 at Miss Teen USA, become best friends with my mom, meet Yolanda King, be the president of my sorority Zeta Tau Alpha & speak at the 2008 National Convention, graduate with honors from New Mexico State University, get accepted into my only post-college job choice- Teach For America, teach 2 years of pre-k, ride in a hot air balloon, give a congratulatory speech to New Mexico's first female governor Susana Martinez at her Inaugural Children's Ball, be Miss New Mexico USA 2011 and place top 16 at Miss USA and be named "fan favorite," and join the Teach For America Oklahoma team as a Manager of Teacher Leadership Development...

What I remember most about all of these things is the people I was so fortunate to have met along the way. The adventures wouldn't have been nearly as wonderful or memorable without these incredible people in my life. I realize now that 25 is not just a number but a trophy. I am so grateful for each year that I age because I know that it just means I will be blessed with the graces of more incredible people and more time with the incredible people I already have been blessed with. 

As I think about the first quarter of my life I know that as a newborn I did not plan for any of this... but as a 25 year old I am determined to make the next quarter just as magnificent as the first. Through this determination (and being the list maker that I am) I've found it most appropriate to establish a set of resolutions & goals...

• Care less about age & remember that with age comes incredible people and fond memories that I'll never get tired of thinking about, laughing about, or talking about.
•  Remember others' birthdays. A sweet home-made birthday card in the mail the other day from a high school friend that I haven't seen in years brightened my day in countless ways. It made me reflect on how valuable these relationships have been to my life and how many wonderful people I have come to know. I must get better at showing others how much they mean to me.
• Further my education and attend graduate school on the east coast. My heart is set on Harvard's Graduate School of Education but that could change. Regardless, I'm committed to a life of learning.
• Do what I want. I will do more of what I want and less of what I think I should do. This means I am learning to trust myself and my judgment and accept full responsibility for all outcomes with complete faith that all will turn out exactly as it should.
• Show my body some love. I made the decision 3 years ago to stop eating meat- but that hasn't had the best effects on my eating habits in general. I will nurture my body with foods that make me feel great and give me the right kind of energy. I'll also give my body more endorphins by doing more "feel good" exercise.
• Budget. I will take better care of my finances and create a practical budget to stick to. I want to live life as debt free as possible and spend less time thinking about those germ-ridden-bills known as "money" and their dominating effects.
• Find my rocking chair partner without assertively looking. This is in no way an attempt for pity but simply a conscious effort to spend more thoughts in the moment rather than in an unlikely daydream. I trust that in time I'll know exactly who this is suppose to be.
• Get to know my brothers better. They grew from 4 & 2 to 18 & 16 in the blink of an eye. As my brothers grow older with me I find more and more opportunities to relate to them. They are two very cool kids and I can't wait to get to know them even more over the next 25 years.
• Embrace my imperfections. While striving to always improve I also want to embrace my flaws- something I have only just learned to do within the past few years. I'm learning to love myself for who I am and thus beginning to judge less and love others more as well.
• Write down the stories... I have a very strong feeling that the next 25 years will be nothing short of spectacular, therefore I must commit to writing more about my experiences so that in old age I can reflect on the sweet memories.

 Happy Birthday,

"pageant" 101: never take yourself too seriously

Woah woah woah.... don't go assuming that this post is only for pageant goers. In fact, I hate societies depiction of the word "pageant." A pageant, by definition, is:

"a public entertainment consisting of a procession of people in elaborate, colorful costumes, or an outdoor performance of a historical scene."

... understood to me as how one carries and presents themselves to the world. We are all performing, whether we know it or not, or frankly like it or not. So why not take every opportunity to improve and reign like the queen you are?[!!!]

Pageant Tip #1
Never take yourself too seriously.

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 When you subject yourself to judgment you're asking for just that, judgment. We all subject ourselves to judgment every day, the slight difference is pageant queens do it on a stage. In order to showcase yourself the best way that you can you must take it lightly and recognize that the judgment is not a reflection of you, it's a reflection of the judge mixed with how you are allowing yourself to be perceived by them. Phew- doesn't that feel better? Now let it all out. Prance around like the winner you are. Take feedback for what it is, learn from it, grow from it, and straight up discard it if you find no true value from it or alignment to who you know in your heart you are meant to be.

As a titleholder you must be approachable. How can you be approachable if you can't even approach and accept yourself? You must live your adventures with an intention of playfulness. It's how you give the most and get the most from even the most uncomfortable situations. Who doesn't love a girl who can laugh at her own flaws and recognizes them as areas of growth or quirks to who she is? By taking yourself too seriously you expect others to take you too seriously... which just means you're building an even higher pedestal to fall from ...because even the greatest fall, the only difference is that they know how to survive the impact.

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So you win some you lose some. I had a hard realization last October. It was right before the Miss New Mexico USA pageant and I was practicing my interview with some pageant friends. I was taking myself & the goal I was working towards SO seriously. My friend could undeniably see that and he said to me "I had never seen that in you before Brittany, I was so surprised. You can't let this be 'do or die'. You just can't." That was a long ride home. The next morning I woke up from a sore slap in the face- thankfully. It's because of that push to realizing the abandonment of my true self that I was able to glide through my night at the Miss New Mexico USA pageant a few weeks later. As I sat backstage before the top 5 were about to be announced I thought to myself "It's ok, this isn't the end. Regardless of the outcome I'll still walk off the stage as Brittany Toll and I'll still be greeted the exact same way by the exact same incredible friends & family who came to support me." I tell you it was the strangest feeling in the whole world. I even asked myself "Wait? Don't I want this? Why am I willing to accept either outcome?" It was because I had finally realized that it wasn't "do or die" like my wise friend had said.

Not too long ago a newly acquired friend told me "I love that I can just poke fun at you and tell you how it is and you never get upset or take it personal." Now of course let me say this- you have to have your limits, if he was out-of-line then of course I would put my foot down, but everything we joke about is true. I have learned that the best way for me to live is to just accept myself for who I am, and learn to laugh at my unique quirks. It's much easier to laugh with the crowd then to go against them. I realized at that point that I had learned this skill from pageantry and didn't even know it. It was a vital skill for me to learn and it has provided me ease & joy through all of my experiences on & off the stage.

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So, be it a sparkly new crown you seek, or simply a life of amusement, learn from your inner queen; it's never too serious. It's never "do or die." It's about you being you and taking the courage to embrace that. Have fun with yourself and prance your love around in your tallest heels on the biggest stage under the brightest spotlight. You will love yourself more & you will effortlessly allow others to feel the same way.

sparkles & love,

...stay tuned for more pageant tips and email, Tweet, comment, or snail mail me any thoughts about what you would like me to deep dive into a bit more. Cheers!

Fall Weekend

She spent her Saturday morning at the farmer's market & the thrift store...

At the farmer's market she found summer squash, cherry tomatoes, an Irish Cream latte, fresh basil, a potted Hindu Rope plant, two onions, and a jar of raw local honey...

Then it was off to the thrift store where she found a new set of shabby chic bowls, stemless blue glasses, a men's flannel shirt (perfect with leggings for the fall/winter), a soft pink chalice & a green glass chalice. Fabulous pieces to add to her cozy loft....

What will you make of your fall weekends?

basil, bargains & bliss,

Fond Feelings For...

 IKEA Stockholm Throw

Perfect for lazy Sundays. 

"Mohair wool with a silky luster."

Pocketbooth app for iPhone

Best $.99 you'll ever spend on an app.

Charles Smith "The Velvet Devil" Merlot 

"Milk chocolate, wild blackberry, baking spice, rose oil...beautifully perfumed Washington in a glass....Velvet Devil?"

 Very Volatile Denver Boot

...& even better when you find them in your size at DSW for 75% off. 

 Lush Eau Roma Water

Sweetly scented of lavender and roses. Mist it on your face in the morning and skip the a.m. wash. Take care.

...things are just things but they sure are fun from time to time.

feathers, flowers & footprints,

happy monday [ i & i ]

inspiration:

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...zzzzz

idea:

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It's almost September, which means it's almost fall! In celebration of a new month and season upon us set some time this week to write your September goals. What do you want to accomplish? What will you have learned? How will you have pampered yourself? How will you ensure that you had fun and made the most of it?

A sneak peak at what I'm including on my goals:

• Re-connect with someone. 
• Go running before work/in the am 5 days a week. Increase distance and time using iPhone app.
• Build a pillow fort and read The Hunger Games
• Begin to become an expert at something...
• Write in my gratitude journal

sleep, sing & slumber,

New Mexican Love Letter

Dear New Mexico,

Oh how I love thee, have I told you lately?

Although my toes cannot sink into your red sand, my lungs cannot fill with your warm air, and my eyes cannot be privileged with your breathtaking landscape my heart is still in sync with all that you have given me. Every morning I wake with warm gratitude for who I am and where I've been. Although I am not there, I am still a relentless servant to you.

I advocate for you daily by ensuring every individual I encounter leaves with a more enlightened perspective of you. I sing your praises and educate others on your gifts. I speak of your people, landscape, culture, and cuisine with more enthusiasm, passion, and respect than one could possibly imagine. I feel it would be far too selfish of me not to share The Land of Enchantment and it's bountiful goods with those less fortunate to know.

I act only as myself and no one else because I am incredibly proud of who I have been molded into thanks to your presence in my life. By this I hope to make others more comfortable with being themselves as well. I would not be who I am if it weren't for you and I promise I'm the proudest New Mexican anyone ever knew.

I operate with my experiences at the forefront of my mind. After working with the children of your state for over 2 years I know that all children can achieve greatness and that I should expect nothing less from any child. Because of that the children of Oklahoma will be held to equally as high expectations and therefore receive the education they deserve in order to lead prosperous and purposeful lives.

I am invested in your products and tangible items. I illuminate the palates of non-New Mexicans by gifting them with pinon coffee and green chile. I scavenge the grocery isles for New Mexican brands and familiar foods. I represent you in countless ways and am nurtured by your crops. I wear your turquoise, eat your pecans, and sleep under your dream catchers.

I am blessed beyond words and prouder than ever. It's funny how we take for granted what we have until we no longer have it. Everything I think and do is influenced by you and every piece of who I am is a product of thee.

New Mexico Love,